When I was at work yesterday, one of the customers that will sometimes stop in to chat with me came to the counter. I hadn't seen him in such a long time; it was really awesome to see him. He said hello, asked how I was doing and then asked what my plans were for the summer, if I was going to do anything exciting. I told him no and asked what his plans were, to which he replied, nothing really. Then he said, wow, you look beautiful. I blushed and mumbled thanks, and he said your eyes are beautiful too. I stuttered another thanks, and then he smiled gently at me, patted my hand, and told me to take care.

That was just one of the events that made my day. The other was sadly clouded by petty anger and hurt, which I bitterly expressed by taking indirect shots at the people I love; one person in particular got the brunt of that. They have been harmed that way for far too long and should never have been hurt like that in the first place. I want to stop taking my problems out on other people. I want to be able to share what I'm feeling, to admit that I have problems. I want to talk about those problems and finally be able to solve them and have you share your own problems with me. I want to stop being afraid and to go back to the basics. I love you. I don't want to lose this. I want to be close again. I want to make you happy.

'i'm frightened by what i see
but somehow i know that there's much more to come
immobilized by my fear
and soon to be blinded by tears
i can stop the pain if i will it all away'
-Evanescence